THE ROCKSTAR.

you have yourself to blame. you triggered this.

i hate you
and i've lost all respect for you as my mother

youre never supportive
you always question
youre so fucking judgemental. so quick to jump to conclusions about other people. even your own daughter isnt spared.
youre always losing your temper at people. and when you find out youre in the wrong, you never, never apologise. but then you expect me to??

you've never fulfilled your duty as my mother
all you did was provide food, shelter and an education

you were never there when i needed you most
you never listened
and when you did listen, you turned what i said against me
you turned your back on me

its not that i've become brazen
and im not answering back
im just protecting myself from whatever this is that youre inflicting on me.

you were selfish too.
you divorced daddy when i was just a child
you werent there. you were too busy with lawrence and his children. what about your own? you didnt even let my own father near me. daddy missed out on me growing up. and we can never get that back, ever. i hated my childhood because of you. now, thinking back, it kinda was non-existent.
i guess you were scared to lose me to him. but hey, you alr kinda did when you chose your boyfriends over me. and you always do. you missed out on my most important birthdays because of them.
you have no idea how much you've hurt me.

youre supposed to be my mom.
but all you did was cause me tears.

you made me feel like im such a disappointment to you. i've never made you proud. you've never been proud of me. you never said you loved me.

how can i ever heal from this. when youre constantly doing this to me.

im so damaged.

posted by Rinster @ 10:26 pm